So, as I'm doing a schoolproject about skinny girls (and boys), I want your opinion about all those skinny models and girls who think they're too fat and all that stuff. Why do you think this is? Is it the media? What can we do about it?

What I want is your opinion :)

I think it's not only the influence of the media and the fashion world, but also of the family and the education.
First off, I have to say that I'm very tall and quite thin. I'm going to tell you that I've entered a hostess-agency this week and I know there is much stuff going on. But especially the modelling world is a competitive environment and models (not only girls, also guys) with a bad education on nutrition and self-confidence are weaker than people who have been strictly educated to be less influenced by other people's comments. My parents have taught me that I have to trust myself and that I can afford eating what I want because I am healthy and was born like this, no matter if people like it or not. My parents did a great job on this. When I was 15 years old I guy on the street offered me a contract for his modelling agency and I rejected it. My parents wouldn't have had allowed me to sign it because they thought I was not "prepared" for this. I was mentally veeery immature and still had lots of insecurities going on..
Also, it's not like "you're skinny, so you're perfect". There's a lot of scorn towards skinny people as well. When I was 13 years old all of my girlfriends said "hey, you look ANOREXIC" to the point that I really believed this. I went to the doctor and he told me that I am fine and that this is my complexion. But none of those girls told the fat people in my school to "loose weight, you're so fucking fat!" (which they shouldn't xD).
When people see anorexic models on tv, they're like "OH MY GOD SHE IS DISGUSTING". It is a DISEASE, for christs sake...maybe you should include in your project that this is a lack of respect. No one with normal morals sees an armless person and goes "omg how disgusting", almost no one sees an obese guy and says "oh my god he is fucking revolting"...so people shouldn't say that about skinny people that actually are victims of a disease.

As for your essay...who's fault is all of this?
I don't really know...it's mainly the parents' and the media's fault. These things wouldn't happen if parents would control what their children watch and read and if they would focus also on teaching their children the value of self-confidence. Also, nutrition and food is a main point in education...parents should also focus on that.
On the other hand, if the media (and modelling agencies) wouldn't accept too skinny models to walk on the catwalk or to appear in magazines, all of this would be a smaller problem. Sometimes they hire too skinny people, sometimes they hire "normal" people who become too skinny because they are influenced by some people's comments in this world.
Still, anorexia existed before top models appeared. For example, Sissi (the Austrian empress) had anorexia.

Let me add that men are starting to feel this pressure women feel. You know, women (and I think there are very few exceptions) feel the need to be "perfect"...no cellulitis, bodyhair removed, perfect boobs, nice hair, flawless skin...but guys are starting to suffer this too. Now they (at least in Spain) are under the influence of the media as well, as the media "tells" them to be metrosexual: to remove their bodyhair, use facecreams and other cosmetics, and so on.

Sorry for the long text :blush:

I know a girl that used to be anorexic. She became anorexic because of various shit, but it all was leading back to the fact that she used to bullied.
So it's a confidence thing for sure. She still lacks confidence, even though when you see her you'd be like "Omg she looks so nice!". She amazingly recovered on her own from the anorexic bahaviour. According to a specialist she is one of the first ever in Europe that has recovered on her own. (that means: without getting treatment in some organisation or by doctors)

There's also tons of people out there, like Sofi and me, that are skinny but can't help it! I can eat everything I want, nothing changes. And the balance between what goes in and what goes out is not even. To me it feels like there goes way more in. And I try to figure 'where the fuck does it all go?'. It's not like I do heavy lifting or stuff like that.
Life is good though! :D

Nice, Max :lol:
But I'm with you....where the heck does everything land??? :lol:

Maybe it turns into breath, so we breathe it out. :P

for me it's sick...they (boys and girls) want to be like some cool model (or just have problem in theirs minds) and they don't eat and all those kids become like skeleton with skin....no meat, no fat...just bones and skin. I read somewhere long time that all those kids (almost 85%) die because don't want medical help. It's so sad when parents outlive own kid/s. You have a movie with that problem.


Max dear...you're not skinny...you know what is skinny????
You looking very good, you're awesome boy...and this is skinny...sick skinny



I hope Max my dear friend that you don't chew gum all day.

title for movie "The Best Little Girl in the World" from 1981

Depending on what you eat...it will go to your arteries if its fat...stuff happens on the inside. My brother...is really skinny...in his arms it can be quite difficult to get blood because the needle will hit the bone...on his back he has some fat. I'm skinny by proportion...coz im 4ft 7 so im gonna be small but i have fat...but i cant see my ass or my legs....so, i dont really bother with it. I'm disabled so....being skinny to look good...doesnt matter, people look at me weirdly anyway.

Haha. Nice project.

I think the problem is that people hardly ever think for themselves. In the business world, this is referred to as "Groupthink". In other words, people spend so much time trying to come together with a consensus of what is right that the media just feeds on it, and THEN the media becomes the problem because it spreads it around a network.

So the problem is people in general.

I personally used to be 100 pounds and I hated every second of it. Is it really natural for girls to want to look wimpy and weak? I don't think so. I went on a hormonal injection to get rid of my periods, cos I hate periods, and gained about 30 lbs. It's a side effect that I desperately needed, and am glad I finally have some meat on my bones.

Anyway, who knows what the true origin is? It's difficult to cut to the source, and I would agree that several factors influence this. You should do some research on "groupthink" and include it in your project, though.

Now as for boys, I would say that a boy who likes to be skinny actually IS thinking for himself. The media likes guys to be tall, huge and bulky. Give me a short skinny guy any day!

Well..
I think there is a HUGE diffirence from being skinny (normally skinny, when you don't try to starve yourself, cause some poeple are buildt that way) to being sickly skinny.
The media might have an affect on people considering this specific subject, some it might not touch at all. But I also think it might start as a normal diet and just someone trying to go down a few pounds and then grows into an obsession.
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Insecurities probably has a huge role in this.
I think model agencies should have some a little more normal weight people in their shows and stuff because being that skinny (for example as shown in the pic Sandra posted) is not healthy and not normal.
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I am not that skinny, I would like to go down a few pounds because I think it would make me feel better mainly physically. I'm not fat or anything, I'd say I'm pretty much normal.. maybe. Whatever normal is :) . But I would never personally like to be sickly skinny, I find no beauty in it.

I hate it that there seems to be some kind of 'standard' when it comes to 'beauty'. Every celeb chick is skinny. A perfect example is Keira Knighley. Damn does she look bad! They posted a pic on a guy forum and everybody got horny and said she was hot. I on the other hand felt a bit disgusted, and when I looked at her bones sticking out I could only think: "Damn, if I'd ever have sex with someone like that, it must hurt like hell because her bones would just stick in me!". I really didn't find her attractive.
And well, you see it with tons of celeb girls out there.
I like it when a girl has just a bit more than the 'beauty standard'. I even think slightly fat girls are hot. There are limits though! :P But well you get what I mean.
Too skinny is just as ugly as too fat.

Yeah max but if she's that skinny she might have a disease (i mean anorexia or bulimia or some eating disorder). So, as I said, it's inappropiate in my opinion to say "how disgusting, the bones are sticking out etc". We have to choose our words carefully!

Yes but in the end she chose to do it.
I'm sure she is or has been anorexic. If you can convince an anorexic person that being skinny is disgusting, I'm sure they'll recover. They'd do as much as possible to avoid negative chatter about them, because it's a confidence issue.

After reading the posts, I must say I mostly agree with Juju, here.
I agree with basically everything she said (about the media and insecurities), which is convinient, 'cause I don't have to type it anymore :P
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On the other side, people can also be skinny because of their live's situation.
Take for example, a certain musician (doesn't matter who :P ) has got a lot of trouble eating on tour, which causes him to vommit a lot, which of course is not healthy. I don't know whether it's some sort of disorder or not, but I do know that he eats better when back home.
I guess, if you've got something like that, you could call it some sort of disorder and I think something like that shouldn't be difficult to solve; try eating more on tour (even though the person's not really hungry) and maybe see a doctor. Seeing a doctor is always good if you've got any kind of eating disorder, IMO.
That leads me to anorexia. If the topic's being spoken about at school or on TV, I hear people say: 'Geez, why don't they just go and see a doctor?'. I think the reason why they don't do that is because they don't know it's a disease, because they see it as 'just losing weight' (or maybe also 'losing weight because I have to be 'perfect'', or something like that).
So, it's a true disease and it's hard to get rid off.
To prevent this from happening is also very hard, because the kids that get anorexic might read stuff on the internet, see models on TV (and other programs), read stuff in magazines that might not directly support it, but give them an extra, I don't know, 'crack' in their heads why they start losing weight.

I guess a lot of anorexic people have all different reasons for it, and not all want to go to a doctor/phsyciatrist. Therefore, it's hard to find the 'true' source of the problem and so very difficult to prevent or even solve.

Sorry for the huge amount of text...

Is your musician a Metallica member, Anne? (if so, I never knew about it)

Actually, he is not :P

I'm not skinny, and never will be! I don't think i'm fat either..
I'm not totally happy with my body, but i'm okay with it.
Some people are born skinny, and always will be skinny. That I don't mind, people are build in a certain way.

But what I don't like is when you got a good nice body, you loose 10 kilo's an unhealthy way (there is nothing wrong with loosing weight but please make sure you do it healthy and stay healthy). And still screaming you are fat, and you are saying to people who are not as skinny you are. (yes this is a situation i actually experienced). In a certain way we felt attacked because we where by near not as flat as she was (luckily).
what I experienced form that is: there where more "curvy" people than skinny people. They stick together because they feel confident around each other, and makes them feel pretty. (that to me is a good thing)
But it also happens the other way round. when there a lots of skinny people around someone more curvy they feel really insecure about themselves.

I also can not stand the fact that when I'm watching a show like American Next Top Model those kids won't fit in the designer clothes... Those girls are to me pretty skinny, If they don't fit in those clothes, which normal healthy person will fit in those??!!
That kind of stuff makes me insecure about myself.. specially when the models are told afterwards to work on there belly's and stuff ( which belly?)..that makes me feel like an elephant!
I actually prefer curves. I'm actually really glad that shows like ANTM pay some attention to plus size models... though they are still a bit skinny but it's a good step.

I actually think that most people prefer some curves on a body. Good looking healthy body. But things like the fasionindustry, hollywood, pro ana sites etc prefer skinny, often unhealthy. Which makes me, and I believe lots of other people doubt their selves. I hate a beauty ideal. People are really insecure beings and want to measure themselves to other people, specially if they are powerfull in a certain way.
I hope I made my point a bit clear

All of my friends are rather skinny, but they were just born that way.
I'm not fat, well, there's some fat on my belly, but I'm not too heavy (1.63 m tall, 57 kilograms).
Though my mom says "better watch out (before you get too fat)" and all that blah blah, and my lil brother says I'm fat all the time, hitting my somewhat chubby belly...

Lame.... :rolleyes:

It's a danger this cult of extreme skinness. And I'm not criticizing those who are skin by nature gift, no. I'm criticizing the fact that society wants us all to conform to this sick model of extreme extreme skinness. Being anorexic is like something to be proud of. I had a severe eating disorder which is still not fixed, and the cause was that I felt laughed at, judged and despised constantly. I had and still have problems in finding proper clothes to fit me, at 1.57 metres and 62kilos, having a rather curvy figure. Clothes are simply far to small to fit on me, and also on many other people. No wonder that so many have eating disorders when the whole society seem to despise with so much strenght every once of fat you have on yourself. If you're not skin to the point of harming yourself, then you're a shame for society.

You know why I used to eat much and was fat? I felt alone, because I was one of those quiet sweet things. My fatness was as much a disease as anorexia was; and for many other people food is a comfort and a help. So, even fatness can be a disease, as much as anorexia: and both are horrible.
Words have not to be choosen carefully when dealing whit these shit, because both these deseases can result in severe health problem and even death. If a boy hadn't told me that my excessive fatness was desgusting, I would just eat more and even more, ending up in some serious damage. And then, when the let's get skinny thing got to my head if my mother and father had not told me I was going to ruine myself and becoming a desgusting and pathetic stupid thing, I would have kept it going to the point of really harming myself. I told the same things to a classmate, and that brutality helped her to understand her problems with food. Being too gentle towards these kind of desease is of no help, from my experience, because people who end up with those are really in need for some very strong adivice. They need to be helped for their own good, no matter if it can be painful. I'd rather suffer it all once again than end up with some serious damage or, worst, end up killing myself.

I get your point!
But if I were in such a situation (for example being anorexic), I would want advice, but carefully said. Anorexic people have a strong self-confidence disorder as well, and telling them how "disgusting" they look won't help, at least it wouldn't work for me. I would prefer to be told that I am "getting so skinny that it's shocking" rather than "hey, you look so disgusting". It's still a disease and people who suffer from it shouldn't be treated without respect because of it, and "omg that bony chick is disgusting" is not respectful imo.

A lot of people in my school don't understand that.. I'm half Japanese and it's kinda in my genes to be a little slim, but people constantly ask me really insensitive stuff like "do you ever eat" and "omg, are you anorexic, you poor thing"
It's just as bad as being made fun of for being overweight..
Basically, I just think the whole weight obsession thing is going way out of control......

Well, what do people expect?!
You HAVE to be skinny in todays society to be seen as attractive so OFCOURSE its the medias fault. What person would want to be labelled as "unattractive"?
When you see beautiful, skinny people whenever you open a magazine or turn on the tv ofcourse this will be what you view as attractive in the end.

Exactly! :)

Yeah same here..."omg you're bony".
I'm not saying "hey fatty" to any people out there.

I agree!

I have a friend that ate normal and everything and was very very thin and people would comment on it to the point that she'd cry cause she couldn't help being that thin.

She later went to the doctor and got a diet to make her gain weight and it worked, she's still thin but not as skinny as she used to be.

It used to piss me of when people talked to her that way "omg, you're so thin, nasty!" Because it wasn't her fault, so I think people should think before they open their mouth. And besides anorexic or not, everyone deserves respect.

i think it´s nonsense that everyone´s bothering about weight, i´m 1.74m and weigh about 58kg, which is not so much for my height, but still there´s some fat around my belly and stuff...so weight doesn´t tell too much about your figure, that´s why i think it´s bullshit to take weight as an aim when you´re trying to become skinnier...

that's true, because when I start to loose weight it is in my face, boobs, but and legs...
and at last my belly... but then I will be underweight and have a face like a corpse

And not only at school... My mother is obsessed about me loosing weight(although i don't think I'm THAT fat, 1.60 meters tall, 58 kg) There's a lot of pressure from her, it's unbearable... In order to make her shut up, i tried a "fast" diet, and ended up in hospital.... i think that this is the reason why there are so many anorexic girls nowadays... :(

Yeah. The cult of perfection is killing us all.

:o But that's a totally normal weight, Angela.
You don't need to diet - you sound fine the way you are :)

THANK YOU!!! that was just what I wanted to hear!!! although I don't have a problem with my figure, she keeps making fun of me... I can't take it any longer, I have to do something quickly, if I don't want to go nuts!!!!

Don't worry - my mother drives me insane as well, we don't really speak to each other :ugh:

Who needs a mom, that's my motto...

Uh..
That's very sad to hear. My mom and I can talk very well. I wouldn't wanna miss it for the world and I can't imagine it being any other way.

I agree, i don't want to be estranged with my mom,but she needs to understand me... I wish someone'd tell her to go easy on me! Luckily things now are better than they used to be... and I hope it'll get better cos it's up to her! :)

You're lucky, I would love to have a relationship with my mom like that, but it's impossible - we just don't get along and therefore we don't really talk..
But this whole mom thing is getting of the subject of this thread, I shouldn't have brought it up... :wacko:

Today I got called a fucking whale again. Damn it. Won't this ever end? I know I'm not skinny, but I'm not that horribly fat. Damn it, damn it, damn it, why can't they just leave me be?

^^^^^^
OMG!!!! what asshole said that to you!!! :angry Just don't listen to them, don't let them spoil your day!!!! :P
I know exactly how it feels, I've been in your shoes before.... :(
Just be yourself, and fuck everybody else...........!!!!!

Wtf? You looked great on your pics! How can that be called a whale? A whale is much fatter! :P

Thanks to you both, Max and Angela. :)